How to Build Confidence
9 Secrets to Maximizing Self-Belief!
Building confidence is a crucial aspect of personal growth and success. It isn’t just about feeling good about yourself; it’s about believing in your abilities and having the courage to pursue your goals.
A man with tons of talent and ability, but no self-confidence, will fail every time. He’ll talk himself out of succeeding. He’ll give up before even trying.
On the other hand, a man with confidence will often succeed despite his shortcomings. Why? Because he pursues his goals relentlessly, interpreting so-called “failures” as valuable learning experiences. He takes chances on himself, and he doesn’t stop until he’s reached his objective.
No matter who you are or what you do, confidence is the most valuable asset you have. In this article, I’m going to teach you how to develop it to its full potential!
How to Build Confidence:
Two Types of Confidence!
Do you want to become a more confident person in general, or is there a specific situation or activity you want to feel more sure of yourself in?
It may seem like a trivial difference, but it’s not. What you want determines your coarse of action!
Let’s start with general confidence.
General Confidence
Becoming a more confident person takes time; it doesn’t happen over night. It’s the result of an accumulation of life experiences, as well as consistent effort to learn from those experiences.
It can’t be faked, and no one can give it to you. It must be earned.
However, just living life isn’t always enough to become a more confident person. There are things you should be doing to ensure that, as time goes on, you confidence keeps growing! Here are some key steps to make sure that happens.
How to Build Confidence:
1. Set realistic goals
Start by setting achievable goals for yourself. You should have big goals for yourself, of course, but break them down into tiny steps, and congratulate yourself whenever you accomplish one.
Every time you accomplish a step, no matter how small, you reinforce in your mind the belief that you’re a “go-getter.”You’re the kind of person who gets sh*t done. These small, daily victories will add up faster than you think, increasing your confidence AND self-esteem.
How to Build Confidence:
2. Practice self-care
Take care of yourself both physically and mentally. Exercise regularly, eat healthy food, and get enough sleep. The more healthy you are, the less vulnerable you become to anxiety, apathy, and depression.
Confidence also comes from feeling good about your appearance, so make sure you take care of yourself on the outside as well, and keep telling yourself that you’re beautiful!
How to Build Confidence:
3. Surround yourself with positive people
Being around positive people can help you feel better about yourself. Seek individuals who encourage and motivate you, and avoid those who bring you down.
No Debbie-downers allowed!
How to Build Confidence:
4. Embrace your failures
This is a big one. No one is perfect. Everyone fails. The key is to learn from your failures and use them as opportunities for growth.
The more failures you endure, the more inevitable your success becomes because you’re racking up precious knowledge and experience! That knowledge and experience will also make you more confident in your abilities, because you will have been through it before. You’ve survived loss and so-called “devastation,” and you know it’s not the end of the world!
How to Build Confidence:
5. Speak up and express yourself
Communication is key to building confidence.
Speak up in meetings and express your opinions. The more you do this, the more confident you will become in expressing yourself. Get used to the sound of your own voice, and get everyone else used to it, too!
How to Build Confidence:
6. Planning
Confidence comes from taking action, and its easy to take action when you’ve got a plan. It doesn’t even have to be a good plan; it just has to be some sort of road map to progress!
Make a plan and take the steps necessary to achieve your goals. The more you do, the more confident you will become in your abilities.
How to Build Confidence:
7. Celebrate your successes
Celebrating your achievements is a great way to boost your confidence.
Whether it’s a small accomplishment or a big win, take the time to acknowledge and celebrate your successes. Do gloss over them, and don’t attribute them to “luck.” In time, you’ll start to define yourself as someone who succeeds in general!
If you keep doing these 7 things, you’ll soon become the most confident person you know. It’ll become one of your defining characteristics, and your friends will start to ask you for advice on how they can boost their confidence, too!
Specific Confidence
What’s bugging you?
Do you have to make a presentation, but you have a fear of public speaking?
Do you want to ask someone out on a date, but you get really bashful whenever you’re around them?
Whatever your situation is, you need an action plan. You need to build it according to your specific needs. The key is not to face your fears all at once (unless you’re the adrenalin-junkie type). Do it gradually; it’s more effective!
How to Build Confidence:
8. Systematic Desensitization
If you’re afraid of making 30 minute presentations at work, then break the task into small steps, and practice each step at home, gradually.
Try giving a 2 minute presentation to your closest friend – someone who won’t laugh excessively or be overly critical. Then try a 5 minute presentation. Then 10 minutes.
Next, try giving the speech to two friends at the same time. Then 3.
The point is to desensitize yourself in increments, so that your nervous system has a chance to get accustomed to giving presentations in a relatively comfortable, controlled environment. Faster than you can imagine, you’ll build up the confidence to give 30 minute presentations or even longer, because you’ll have accumulated the necessary experience and desensitization to do so with ease!
This method works for anything!
Afraid of spiders? Spend an hour looking at cute cartoon spiders on the internet. Then an image or two of a real spider. Then a video. Eventually, go to a pet store and look at them in real life.
Keep exposing yourself to whatever you’re afraid of, and your fear will eventually dissipate. That’s what the nervous system does: it becomes desensitized to stimuli, whether you want it to or not.
Afraid of asking a girl out on a date? Practice talking to strangers on the street. Just ask 10 random people for the time, moving on as soon as they give it to you.
If you can do that, then try starting a 10 second conversation with them before walking away. Each exposure will add to your experience, desensitize you, and boost your confidence for that endeavor!
Pretty soon, you’ll be able to ask that girl out in a relaxed, confident manner because your nervous system won’t be on edge anymore. You will have trained yourself to be social.
How to Build Confidence:
9. Affirmations
When it comes to developing both general and specific confidence, the role of positive affirmations can’t be underestimated.
Affirmations are positive statements you read over and over in order to improve how you habitually think. Thoughts are like habits: some are good, and some are bad. The more positive mental habits you develop, the better your life becomes!
If you want to feel more confident, then affirm that you’re a confident person. Force it into your subconscious mind. Say it over and over until it sticks, and the thought comes to you automatically whenever you need it.
If you’ve got phobias or insecurities, affirm that you’re overcoming them! Tell yourself you feel confident in all situations. Keep reminding yourself you can handle anything, and you will be able to handle anything!
Getting control of your mind is the key to building confidence for all situations, and affirmations are the most powerful method of doing that.
How to Build Confidence:
The Method:
Here are some affirmations to help you become a more confident person in general. Read them for 5 minutes everyday, and be amazed at how fast your confidence builds!
You can either print the PDF, or watch the video. If this is your first time working with affirmations, I suggest watching the video. It’s set to pleasant imagery (darkened to make the words easier to read) and calming, relaxing music.
Watch it for 5 minutes. If you feel good afterward (and you will), then start watching that video once a day. The more time you spend programming your mind, the faster your results will come.
Building confidence takes time and effort, but the rewards are well worth it. By following these tips and making a conscious effort to build self-confidence, you’ll be well on your way to living a more fulfilling and successful life.
Do the affirmations.
Good luck!
Affirmations for Confidence
- I believe in myself.
- I feel confident in all situations.
- I can handle anything.
- I’m a brilliant person.
- I am smart, motivated, and capable.
- The world can feel my confidence.
- I’ve got a high self esteem.
- I’m a strong person, and I’m ambitious.
- I can learn to do anything.
- I’ve got big goals, and I’m achieving them one step at a time.
(To further develop your confidence, please see affirmations for success, prosperity, and happiness.)
-Tommy